June28, 2012

I've been through a lot of crap in my life but this is the roughest thing I've ever had to deal with. My best friend, Bethany Marie Deane, passed away last night around 7 pm. She also had SMA, but in the last few years had grown significantly weaker and was constantly getting sick. I know that she is no longer in pain and suffering. I know I'm being selfish by wanting her here, but I guess that's normal. It just hurts so bad...I get better for a few but then it comes again at full force. It feels like someone's ripping out my heart and squeezing my lungs to the point where I can't hardly breathe. I find myself just staring out into space and not being able to focus. Tomorrow is my 21st birthday and I'm having dinner with a bunch of friends and then going downtown Indy, but honestly I don't know how fun I'll be. I'm afraid as soon as I see them I'm going to lose it and start crying again. I'm not sure how it's going to go. I know if Bethany were here she would tell me to stop being sad and have fun on my birthday. So I'm going to try but I think it's going to take a while for me to get back to normal...
~Cait

June6, 2012

I'm officially the worst blogger ever, not that anyone probably reads this anyway, but whatever I'm back now! It was a crazy semester but we had some great times as usual. We had some birthdays, where everyone got together, we watched more movies than one can count, there was a stuffed animal wedding, we ate a lot of Mexican food, and had a blast in Indy during Superbowl weekend to name a few things. It was all a lot of fun. I also got a lot more involved on campus. I continued with hall council and power soccer, but I also became a rep for RHA. Superbowl weekend was by far one of the greatest weekends! It was so fun! The Thursday night of that  weekend, Donelle, Tyler and I went to the VH1 Pepsi Fan Jam concert at the fairgrounds. It was B.O.B., Gym Class Heroes and The All-American Rejects, with special guest Neon Hitch and Adam Levine!! We then went to IHOP afterwards so we didn't get home till after 1 am, then we got up and Tyler and I left at 5 to go to The Today Show. Gym Class Heroes, Adam Levine, and Neon Hitch were there. It was downtown Indy. We got there like an hour before it started but there were already so many people there. I couldn't see a thing, so Tyler went to see what else was going on or something and came back and told me he walked right next to Adam Levine! If only I had gone with him! So we went back to where he saw him, it was this little area back behind/between some buildings. It was between the back of the  building that went out to The Today Show, the place where they were doing interviews for ESPN, and the VIP Lounge where celebs could wait to go to these different things. So we were where they had to walk to get from one to another. We saw a few football players and coaches, (I'm not really sure who), Jimmy Fallon, and Adam Sandler!! We then walked around downtown for a few, looking at all the Superbowl stuff, it was pretty cool. We went back to school after that and relaxed the rest of the day. The next day we were going to get Starbucks and stuff when Donelle found out that Neil Patrick Harris was in Indy. She was freaking out, I was kind of too on the inside. So a bunch of us decided to go back to Indy to try and find him. I didn't go downtown with them though, I actually went to the CMT Fan Jam concert thing with Tyler (he got free tickets), we dropped them all off before we went. We had to wait in the freezing rain for what seemed like hours, but it was worth it. It was a small local band first that was pretty good, and then Sugar Ray! I didn't know they were going to be there! They were awesome! I think I was one of the only people who was really excited for them but I didn't care, I loved them when I was younger! Then it was the actual CMT concert, which was Carrie Underwood and Steven Tyler. They sang mash-ups of their songs together, it was surprisingly really good! Then we picked everyone up and went back to our everyday lives, the excitement was over. We had a lot of fun over the semester. I have the greatest friends ever. I am so lucky to have them all in my life. I honestly don't know what I would do without them. They're all wonderful, and now that it's summer I'm missing them a lot. Hopefully most of them get to go to my birthday dinner in a couple weeks! Well this blog is awkwardly long now so if you're still reading this, you should really go find something else to do, my life is not that interesting, really it isn't. So go now and I'll stop writing. Bye!

~Cait :)

Jan26, 2012

Hello...it's been forever since I've just written in here. Things are going pretty well here. Last semester was crazy busy! This semester is much better! I don't have any fashion classes, which means no sewing. I have decided to switch my major to fashion merchandising instead of design, because there was just too much physical work. I think I'll like this though, I'll still be doing what I love but it'll be easier for me. With this major though, I have to pick up either a marketing or entrepreneurship minor. I'm not quite sure which I'm going to do yet. Changing won't put me behind at all, I think I actually may be done on time now actually. I just replace four of the sewing classes for merchandising classes. This year I am doing soccer, FDS, and hall council. This semester, soccer is on Wednesday's as well as Hall Council. I'm trying to balance them though because I love them both. I am so involved this semester! I am treasurer and self-appointed PR for soccer. I am on the PR committee for the upcoming fashion show for FDS. And I am PR for Hall Council. As of last night I am also now an RHA rep for Hall Council. I had my first meeting tonight for it and guess what! I got placed on the PR committee for that too! I think this is a sign...maybe I should major in public relations instead...nah! I just think it's fun. It's now the 27th which means it's Laura's birthday!! So if you're reading this, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!! I can't wait for this weekend! Saturday is the NRHH Conference, (which is Disney themed!), and then we are all going out to dinner for Laura and Chad's birthday, his is the 31st! I'm really excited for everyone to be together! And when I say everyone, it literally is almost EVERYONE! It's going to be fun! Ok well I'm going to go for now, I have a test in less than 9 hours, it's in music history though so it should be easy. Night!
~Cait:)

NEW BLOG STUFF!

Wow that only took me like 4 months to complete the 30 day letter challenge…fail! Well now I can go back to writing stupid pointless things that probably nobody reads anyway! Yay! Hahaha okay well I’m actually going to bed now, I just wanted to finish that up so it would be over with. NIIIIGHT!!
~Cait :)

Day 30: Your Reflection In The Mirror

Dear Caitlin,
You’re fine just the way you are. Quit caring about what other people think, it’s not worth it. Just be yourself and people will love you just the way you are, and if they don’t that’s their problem, their loss. Never forget this.
~Caitlin

Day 29: The Person You Want To Tell Everything To But Are Too Afraid

Dear person who shall remain nameless,
I really love having you in my life, you’re one of the greatest friends I’ve ever had. You’re so nice and funny and caring. You make me happy just by talking to me, and make me feel better no matter what’s going on. I wish I could tell you all these things and tell you how much I like you but I’m afraid of messing up this wonderful friendship. It’s happened before and I’m just not willing to take that chance. I wish you would know though, and that you were totally ok with it and maybe felt the same but I know no matter how hard I wish, it isn’t going to come true.
<3 Cait

Day 28: Someone That Changed Your Life

Dear Matt,
Oh look at that, another letter…but you really changed my life. You’ve done so much for me that if I listed everything, this letter would be too long to fit on Tumblr. You have helped me overcome so many hardships in my life. You made me realize that a true friend, like you, will always be there for me no matter what and love me for who I am. You made me realize that I’m not alone in this world. You helped me not only physically, anytime I needed something, but emotionally and mentally. I still have those rough days but I know that you are always there for me, along with our other friends. I know I can always come to you when I need something, whether it’s needing help getting in and out of my soccer chair or just needing a hug. You’ve become one of the best friends I could ever imagine. You know me better than anyone else, sometimes even myself. I am so grateful to have you in my life!
Love you,
Caitlin :)